Resilience in Action: My Journey of Building WiseGoals Amidst Mental Health Challenges
There was a time in my life when everything I knew, everything I believed, and everything I was, seemed to disintegrate into nothingness. I was working for local government, running a youth parliament... my life over the past decade was a whirlwind of fun activity, moving from one exhilarating experience to the next. This included living in Japan, lots of travel, and many varied jobs. Then, in one defining moment, my world came crashing down.
It was as if my entire being—my mind, my thoughts, my body—shut down. I was drained of every ounce of energy. The vibrancy and vitality that had once defined me were replaced by an overwhelming sense of darkness. This wasn’t just a bad day or a rough patch; it was the deepest of depressions. I couldn’t speak or hear at times, and even the simplest of tasks, like standing up or walking downstairs, took an eternity. An hour to stand, another to descend.
I couldn’t work. For eight long years, I was paralyzed by an invisible force that kept me locked away from the world. I became unable to wash for months, and was terrified to leave my house and be seen by others in this state. I couldn’t even scrape together enough money to take a bus to see a friend. I reached out for financial support, but my plea was met with rejection. For a while, I even become homeless.
The hardest part was the feeling of utter powerlessness. I had always been a goal-setter, driven by a relentless passion to achieve. How could I ever speak to others about goals again? Why would I even want to? Wasn't I the best ever example of why not to set goals? I looked at myself as an imposter —my words empty and unwanted. My past enthusiasm seemed blustery and shallow, a stark contrast to the reality I was now living.
This crushing despair was, unbeknownst to me at the time, a crucial part of my journey. It stripped away my narrow view of success and failure and opened me to the vast range of inner realities people face. I had to experience this unimaginable pain to truly understand and be more powerful in helping others.
It was during this abyss of suffering that everything was actually changing. There wasn’t a single moment of revelation, but a gradual shift. Slowly, I began to grow through the darkness- becoming a person of greater depth and wisdom. The experience of being broken down to my core, of feeling unthinkable pain, was exactly what I needed to break through to a broader more encompassing self. It gave me a deep, empathetic understanding of the struggles people face, making me better equipped to help them set meaningful goals and navigate their own difficult paths.
Looking back, I am blown away by the transformation. The very thing I thought would stop me from achieving my goals turned out to be the catalyst for actually achieving them. Life’s magic lies in its ability to use our deepest struggles to propel us to our greatest triumphs.
I learnt the hard way that sometimes the worst imaginable experience is the gateway to a far better life. I learnt to trust in the process, even when it seems unbearable. The many years of pain and confusion I endured has become my greatest gift, a change in my heart and life.
Thank you for reading.
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